Thomas Aquinas once suggested that it’s a sin not to give a compliment to someone when it’s deserved, because by withholding our praise we’re depriving that person of the food that he or she needs to live on. He’s right. Perhaps it’s not a sin to withhold a compliment but it’s a sad impoverishment, both for the person deserving the compliment and for the one withholding it.
We don’t live on bread alone. Jesus told us that. Our soul too needs to be fed, and its food is affirmation, recognition and blessing. Every one of us needs to be healthily affirmed when we do something well so as to have resources within us with which to affirm others. We can’t give what we haven’t got. That’s self-evident. And so for us to love and affirm others, we must first be loved, first be blessed and first be praised. Praise, recognition and blessing build up the soul.
