The Great British Bake Off (BBC One, 8pm, Wednesday) puts me in mind of The Prisoner, that 1960s telefantasy about a spy who wakes up to find himself in an English village that is too perfect to be real. Rolling hills. A marquee. Bunting. And 11 English people so English that they just have to be KGB. A vicar, a housewife. A saucy spinster who makes innuendos about her spatula. An older lady with a beefy henchman – she approaches our hero’s table and hisses: “Zu hast two hours to maken einen lardy cake ... iftz zu wanten to live!”